Devotional Post

Psalm 103:13Like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear him.

The first shocking statement seen in this passage is the word pitieth. Pity in the english language carries this idea of contempt or worthlessness. This definition is certainly not something we want as people. Further study reveals that pitieth has to do with compassion from a higher state.

A Father has compassion on his children so the Lord does with those who fear him.

We carry very unique connection God as Father. 

For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.

The end and around connection that writer makes turns out to be prophecy. The fear in this case of Roman vs Psalms. If both mean the same thing but on has to do with fear as fright or terror. In that of the old testament the fear has to do with reference.

Now knowing what we know I want you to breathe in the sweet air of communion between your heavenly Father and yourself. I want you to hear his words of comfort he speaks to you as you read this scripture allow.

 I will put my laws into their hearts, and in their minds will I write them; And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more....I will put my laws into their mind, and write them in their hearts: and I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people...

Take a moment breath deeply into his adoption. He HIS spirit in YOU and made you HIS. He has made you pure,  He has made you royalty, He has made you one with Him. Close you eyes and hear his words of approval.

For he hath made Jesus to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.

We have been indebted to live after the spirit and in so doing we manifest our relationship with God by our very lives.

 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh.For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live. For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.

Today as you go throughout your day I want you to say this to yourself.

I Am A Child of God. 

EEEK..im going to listen...

I had opportunity to minster yesterday and I feel like I bombed it...but I am going to go head and listen and take some notes.

I am aware that I did not give myself to the proper amount of preparation which was challenge in and of itself.

1. Print Your Notes Out - Mainly the scriptures using them on alternate paper is helpful when technology is not inline with your presentation.

About 20 Mins In

1. So far only issue is that was no real feel and no apparent connection between my text and the text Genesis 4:1-8.

- The highlight of both Genesis 3 / 4 was intent to highlight the nature of sin and its ability to distort on the  internal, external and eternal levels.

About 36 mins in

I present a point that does not directly connect to the point I was trying to make.
- The safeguard against temptation does not connect to the natures of sin but only for when we fall what we fall into. The safeguard of fellowship does not prevent death of george floyd or condemn chavauin.

The only connect that could be made that would make this make sense is that sin and this fallen world launches and onslaught against believers upon which we must defend and support each other defending against.

Topics in the time ( Temptation and Fellowships).

God as father used a verse that talks about Jesus role in declare the father was improperly positioned.
Romans " We have been the given the spirit of adoption whereby we cry abba father." or John " If you have seen me you have seen the father..."

The connection point understand and relate to the father is good...because this is through the son. but that is a loose connection.

Another loose connection - 4:17-20
 The nature of the conversation dealing with being our brothers keeper should be tied to the reality that God is our father and we have family tie that it deeper than our skin, sex and creed. There is a spiritual connection called human that God is pleased with.

If I were to spend less time being a contrarion and more time understanding what is in front of me I might not have that much of an issue with where I am.

I dont really need to listen to the rest of my sermon...I am but Ill ready know where I am going.

When it comes to be church....

I dont use words like product...It insinuates that I am some how connected to what people experience beyond being present and willing to follow the leading of the Lord.

I dont use words like social institution...This insinuates a set agenda by the people in the world who FEEL as if the needs of the community or being met.

I discourage the use of the pulpit as stage....This insinuates that its about the people rather than engaging God.

I am straying away from excellence....Its form of perfection that insinuates our own standards sometime about God's standard.

I detest language of performance when it comes to service....This insinuates that if we make a mistake then there is problem.

I notion of activity can be a farce....to keep us focusing on doing things that are not necessary or maybe necessary but to focused on the things of the world.

When it comes to the spiritual body known as the church....

We have standards....
We have a culture...
We have an idea...
We have a statue by which we serve....
We have a standard by which we are measured.....
We have a mission....
We have a direction...
We are not the world, neither do we need to conform to the things of the world...

The spiritual body known as the church has existed and worked effectively since its creation by the savior. We are must come to reject the social notion of the church and embrace the universal definition. Then and only then can we see where we should be standing....

There is no difference now for our need than before...The world knows we are needed now the space we are occupying (if we are occupying) is where they need us.

They dont need us protesting....they are already doing that...They need us to pray.
They dont need us to petition the government....We are already doing that....They need us to seek God.
They dont need us to yell black lives matter....We are already and have been doing that...They need us to win the war for the soul of america.
They dont need us to do what they are already doing....because the church is already present in those arenas.
They need the spiritual body to hold down is place  so that the change can come.

Our place is before God and as we march, protest and activise...We need to be sure we are fufilling our first responsibilty.

Letter Work

I greet you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. My name is Elder Steven Furr Jr and I recently moved into Bedford Heights I am looking to stay here for quite sometime. Naturally when you find a place like home you want to make yourself at home. The purpose of this letter is alert you of a vision that I believe God gave me and I would like to invite you to be apart.

House of Hope Cleveland.  This is non profit community engagement mission that is seeking to build and rebuild a local communities by providing spiritual and natural services based on the need and resources of the community. With advent of the Black Lives Matter movement there has been so unseeming exposure of the church and its role in the community which has long since been under attack. The public as whole has negative view of assemblies based on cultural ideas that ground the church as only a social institution. The added challenges of those men and women who do unflattering things in the out of the pulpit erodes the relationship between the spiritual body known as the church and the people who need what God has given them.

House of Hope is dedicated to create an in neighborhood 6 days a week response devote to meet the natural and spiritual needs of the people of Bedford Heights by filling a home with God's glory and good works. The specific target of service focus in three main areas education fitness, social awareness, spiritual wellness and vocational development. As you could imagine one man could do this much work alone...thats where you come in. I am looking to put together the development core of what I call DC to began to forge relationships and cast this vision.

I am seeking to make connection with every major institution, community and religious leader within Bedford Heights, Ohio in order to ground this work. I would be honored if you would permit me the space to share my vision in more depth with you and draw on the resources that you have connections with to develop this vision.  My goal is not grow my own ministry but to support the efforts of the universal church and specifically the assembly in which you lead by creating a contact point for ministry and relationship in the community.

We are in the grounding phase of House of Hope Cleveland, I am looking to end this phase with having established at the very least a positive relationship with all the institutions that serve this community by this time next year. At most have garnered  the support of the community to the degree that we can be fundraising to incorporate federally as 501(C)3 and purchase the home outright.

If this is something that has peaked you intrest or you want to know more please feel free to email me.

House of Hope Grounding

The most frustrating thing about where I am right now is that its difficult to put into word what I am trying to do within the community. I am seeing all the application of how the idea of the house of hope can help and support but I know full well if I attempt to explain this in this manner the message will be missed. So I want to get some core values, service philosophies, hard points on House of Hope so I can express it in a manner that the community can get behind it.

Two Main Scripture 
 - Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king. 1 Peter 2:17
- The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. John 10:10

The Service Philosophy
 The tenants of our organization follows the scripture from both a nominal sense and literal sense. Peter in this passage of scripture is engaging the saints on their conduct in the society in which they lived. Both Peter and Paul are challenge with notion of how to behave in the status quo. Jesus teach us to be wise as serpent and harmless as dove. You can hear the sentiment especially from Peter.
Honor. Love. Fear. Honor
The idea behind this concepts as tokens it that yields itself to the idea that there is modicum of respect and decency that will make life simpler to live.
When you flip the concepts to actions then you get a different perhaps more radical picture.
Honor has to do with paying money or a certain amount of attention. Mankind was made in the image of God. Therefore for the image he was made in he is deserving of respect.
Love or agape has to do with the way in which you treat people in the faith with you and or those with whom you share comradrie with.
Fear. This has to do with placing the highest value on our behavior on what God puts the weight on. Seeking to please the Lord in our interactions behaving in a manner that is matches up with the defeence to the Lord ship of Jesus Christ. The Fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge and wisdom.
Honor the King. This ties the whole concept together. Jesus was talking on the subject of paying taxes...to which he responded....rend unto ceasar what is ceasers. As long as we live under-authority we a responsibility to live in line with the law of the land. This make us participants and not rejects...this forces us to act and respond in the affair of our government from a local to national level and do so while keeping those other values in mind.
House of Hope will use these four value in our moderation and explanation and exploration at all times.  Structures will be set in place to ensure we are speaking in deference of respect to our community members, we are acting in love to our fellowman for their benefit by acting with integrity , put the highest value on God's word and honor the governmental system under which we live.
The Issue
It is to often that we categorize life in manner that best suits our needs and our desires. The fact remains that this desire to shape and fashion the life were grant apart of the grantor is part of our sin nature, to see ourselves as apart from God. This separation known as the state of sin produces ill effect in the world in which we live or shall I say occupy relationships. 

We really only three categories of relationships internal, external and eternal.
Our culture would replace eternal with existential but it still refers to reality higher than the mortal world and appeals to the metaphysical or world outside or physical perceptions. The state and act of sin produce a twisting of how we view our selves, how we view each other and this world and how we view god. Internal External Eternal.

This reality mixed with some other cultural ideas about the church as social institution has contributed to the degradation between the community and the church. All of the US are assemblies that have no connection to the community and in some case are in foreign to the world outside their door. The separation has become a divide that must be broken by making genuine connections.

The Answer
House of Hope Cleveland! The aim of this mission is rebuild local communities by providing both spiritual and natural services from within the community tailored to the needs of that community with a special focus on professional development, social awareness and educational achievement.

Our goal is to crowdfund and purchase a home within the Bedford Heights area and begin to offer services like tutoring,  junior job training , youth groups, parent groups, community groups, health and wellness activities, financial wellness activities, service learning opportunities, counseling and many more based on the resources and needs within the community while at the same time using the house as an object lesson to foster an environment for community interdependence.

We want to see the local communities of Cleveland revived and functioning at high rate. The way we intend to do that is to Fill A House with God's glory and good works. While I believe this is God's desire it is the work of community that will make this successful.

The Grounding Phase
The key work to be done in this moment is to build relationships. It is the goal to fly in the face of those systems or incorrectly used systems to keep us divided as people.
1. Churches
2. Community Sources ( YMCA/FoodBank)
3. City Government
4. State Government
5. Business Owners
6. Businesses 
7. Community Members ( Families, Veterans, Retirees )

We are all one people with one role and that is to posses life (zoe) life as god intended it. I believe people don't have to be saved to live better lives...I do believe people must be saved if they want to live their best lives.
 This an effort that is for the people and maintained solely by the people.

The Launching Phase
We intent to incorporate on federal level as 501(C)3 organization to be able to recieve both grants, tax exemption and donation for large corporations who are looking to give tax deductible gifts.
When we are able to crowdfund enough money to buy the home we want to invite community into the formalization of House of Hope in the community by forming what I call the Table.

The Table
- A two fold function as governing body to make decisions that concern the direct of the house as well as to discuss the issue that may be affect our community at large.

• Exploration and Preparation
• The two main form to engage the table.
• Ex - Meant to flush out issues and a civil discussion in an effort to find the course of action.
• Prep - Once we have heard all the people voices we will use community planning techniques to determine how we are going to role out what we do.
• Table Constituency
• Founder
• Director of Concentration
• Community Member
• Participants
• Donors
• Advisors

The Leadership Table

• Advisor
• Founder
• Director

The Community Table

• Founder/Director
• Community Members and or Community Rep
• Participants and or Participant Rep
• Donor and or Donor Rep

Additional Roles

Rep - a rotating group optional elected role to be chosen for each meeting to amass information and represent the communities voice.

Asst Dir - Function as a part of the support team for the administrative responsibility of the director and liaison between community and volunteers.

Volunteers - Will be those people wish to support our effort in donating time toward establish objectives to carry out the mission of the House of Hope under the guides of the director.

Special Foci

Education - Support and Mentorship

- We want to inject a coaching model for those participant who wish to receive tutoring. 

- We want to increase the role of the male in the educational community.

- We want to be a source to support strong teacher parent relationship.

- We want to develop relationship between the youth and elderly to teach history.

Professional Development - Exposure and Entrepreneurship
- We want to recreate the GreenWood wealth within the community.
- We want to increase exposure to hiring practices and resume building.
- We want to collaborate with business owners and business to provide on the job training and exposure opportunities.
- We want to hold seminars that connect the unemployment to education and possible employment opportunity.
- We want to create a furnace of proving to give light to those entrepreneurs who has products and services to offer where there can be feed back, and development through mentorship.

Social Awareness - Exposure and Civic Duty
- We want to increase the knowledge of the community to the political system starting with our local and ending with our national.
- We want to increase awareness to issues that plague our community through service learning opportunities.
- We want to identify community issue and engage in dialogue that will produce actions for a better community.
- We want to strengthen the connection between the city official and enforcement and the community  through collaborative efforts.
- We want to establish and or maintain the tradition of history within the city submitting city days for our historical leader and public figures.

PUSH

A long time ago when I was young child I remember that prayer was key thing in ministry. Alot of the great revivals that I had anything to do with was accompanied by prayer. Ironically as time went on it seems as if the culture of the churches I was attending had changed.

They seemed to be more concerned about how people saw our sacred rite and practices and less about the reason why we engaged them. A short period of time has passed but by the time i was preteen it was common to spend 3 of our services listening to the preached and taught word and maybe one service from the whole week given to prayer.

I found myself struggling to maintain a consistent flow because the habit of prayer is broken. Luckily my father did not consent to such madness. It was him who instilled the need to pray beyond just our temporal needs but to find the heart of God and impact change in the world on spiritual/influential level.

Now  the time of change has happened upon us with the death of George Floyd and the church is scrambling for position in the community. Some have always had the deep ties to the community and others have not. Regardless of where and when the fact remains this has long since been an issue. Before there was protesting, riots, black live mattering, conscious community ,church hurt and sexual conduct allegations the degradation of the community between the church and the community had long since had issues. This moment has exposed the lack in the community of connection to the church.

A similar dangerous reality is the canning and marginalizing of the church as political, social institution for both change and influence. Which if we define the church culturally then it will make sense for us to assume that the church would stand in those veins because this where its constituents serve.

I have such an aversion to run out and protest and stand in the name of God against the things that are happening because I sense the lack of intensity we have toward travailing in prayer and engaging the presence of God on the terms he set. I sense this lack of intensity in prayer when i hear the statement..." We can't JUST pray we have to be active"

2 Chronicles points to a really that was produced BY prayer. If no prayer was present this would not have occurred at all. If you examine the text closely you get to appoint where the people of God went to the place where the fight would happened praised God. They did not fight. They prayed, praised...followed the instructions and praised some more _ Battle over they won.

Acts 2 the disciples and group of people who Jesus ascend into the heavens were told to go to Jerusalem and wait until you be endue with power from on high. 120 people made it to the upper room they were in prayer ministering to the Lord and then there came a sound as of a mighty rushing wind.....Preceding the moment of power was prayer.

Some time later in Acts the apostle where threaten by the same Sanhedrin that put Jesus to death not to preach. The churches response was a prayer quoting the world from psalms 2. Then another sense of awe and power came to the church and they all spoke the gospel with boldness and power.

Yet again sometime later in Acts the apostle Paul encounter Christ on his walk to damascus. The Lord pressed him and he became blinded and was brought into the courts of the apostle and ministers minstering unto the Lord. Then holy spirit said separate unto me

Opportunity

My father called me last night to let me know that my paper work for House of Hope was at his house. I am not sure how it got there because I put my address on it but what ever.

My Father proceeded to let me know that he had placed his application for the pastorate of living faith over on Clevelands west side. He proceed to ask me to be serve with him as serving elder to preach and teach as needed while he would be gone or serving on another level.

He began to explain that the need he had is for a teacher and person who was committed to prayer and the word. Its not uncanny to me that being his child that I would not only echo his emphasis but his disposition towards the things of God that he has.

He did warn that he did not want me to leave if  i felt like there was still work to do and time for me to develop so that I can still work out my time a commitment with Pastor Curtain as the assistant pastor of the ministry.

I am keenly aware of how God has move me from one place to the next. Usually there is some sort of conflict and introduction into a new opportunity well before time of time of it occurs.The there is time of transition and I an in the next thing. This how this a has struck in this conversation.

There is so many ways for my ambitions to get involved in this process. The one way especially has to do with how with how I feel about the nature of my relationship with my father. I have this deep desire to connect with him and work with him while I can get the best out of him.

I am at the twilight years of his life and I want to be by his side should God take him home.The reality is so jarring to me until I can't think about it too long before I break down into tears because I admire and respect all that man has given to me not only as his son but as his mentee. I have held and continue to hold that it is important not to journey away from what and how you were taught to discover its value...but to place the value on it highly now so that when the time between you and the one who has taught you ends...it can find a home in your heart and mind.

This is an ambition that can and will could my decision which i why i need to hear from the Lord on the matter.

My father did offer me an opportunity to serve similar to how he serves at Garfield Memorial Church which involves missing some Sunday services and likely using my free time to support him.

If I step back I see some other factors at play in the conversation.

Historicity - My introduction into church of god in Christ was through that ministry. My heart for developing my passion for tying the spiritual to the natural was birthed in that house.

Prophetic Inclining - My father may be offered more that pastorate but the office of superintendent over the progressive faith district which would but him in the audience of those men who guide the district as whole from a level that my father has not been accustomed to serving. Its also very possible the Lord may be moving me West for the pastorate because the likely hood of my father pastoring another 20 years is low and it is likely my faithful service could position me to be in the role of the pastor of that body.

Next Level - I have always said and recently been saying that promotion comes from God but through relationships. This would be no exception. There would be increase in a level of visibility and increase in the level of connections to be made across Cleveland areas.

I precieve that Pastor Curtain may feel some kind of way about my additional possible commitment. I think the best course of action should this be the case it to lay it out in the following manner.

Pastor Curtian

I wanted to speak with you regarding a ministry opportunity that just opened up for me. My father is take the pastorate over Living Faith on the West side. My father has asked for me to join the staff full time as an elder serving within the church. While I am eager to do so I still feel a sense of commitment and desire serve with you in E collinwood. Its for that reason I have opted to serve as needed with him which may include missing some Sunday's here and there to preach and teach as needed.

I am not sure what the future holds but I know I want to make the most of my relationship with my father as well as you.

Freedom

If I ever get out

Wednesday, April 8, 2020

7:24 AM

This is the first thought that has gone through my mind this morning….

But I know not to say it because then I am lining myself up for a failure. Then I wonder why is there such a barrier that I can say a thing or think a thing that I wish to do but wind up not doing it.

I am aware that my flesh fights the hardest to make sure I cannot do what I want. I am also aware that my willpower is not enough to overcome sin. But why is it when I dig, or do what I think is digging, my feet in sand I fall over.

There has got to be some spiritual words that I can declare that will free me from this bondage.

" Not by power, not by might, but by His Spirit."

Gal 5

" Walk in the spirit and you would fulfill the lust of the flesh"

Rom 8

" 19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin. "

John8

28 Then said Jesus unto them, When ye have lifted up the Son of man, then shall ye know that I am he, and that I do nothing of myself; but as my Father hath taught me, I speak these things.29 And he that sent me is with me: the Father hath not left me alone; for I do always those things that please him.30 As he spake these words, many believed on him.31 Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.33 They answered him, We be Abraham's seed, and were never in bondage to any man: how sayest thou, Ye shall be made free?34 Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin.35 And the servant abideth not in the house for ever: but the Son abideth ever.36 If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.

After an extensive period of roaming throught old and new testatment. What is evident to me is that God has always dealt with sin of his people. He has not created a system in the old or the new where man deals with his own sins, he commits his own sins, he confesses his own sins, he grants his own sins to have access to his life, but it is God who healeth.

It is God who delivers from sin. It is God who sets free. It is God who breaks the chains and clears the inqiuity. It is the owner of judgement and life who settles the score.

So what am I doing. When I swear if I get out…Ill never go back again. I am engaging in a form blasphemy. Because I am saying I can save myself and if I am able to save myself I will never go back. Of course given the power of sin I would have to be God to save myself. Neither would I need Calvary to deliver me from such horror.

My response now is different…Jesus said " If you continue in my word, you will know the truth and truth will make you free."  Jesus made a deal with us. I'll take care of the sin, you just follow me.

30 As he spake these words, many believed on him.

31 Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;

32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

Right there packed in the text is justification, salvation and sanctification.

Jesus said to those that believed on him… If you continue..continue what continue believing in him and his word (your inner will become your outer) then you are my disciples in DEED. Then you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free.

Man shall not live by bread alone but by ever WORD that proceedeth out of the mouth of Him.  The word can only be heard if I am using the right media to receive it or in proximity to hear it. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the WORD.

What does it say then…the WORD is nigh thee…even in thy mouth. That is the WORD of faith which me. That if you confess with your mouth and believe the Lord Jesus.

Powerful words to give attention to. Confess, Believe, Continue.

Confess - Your sin and God is faithful and Just (according to his decree) to forgive you of sin and cleanse you of all unrighteousness.

Believe - That Jesus is indeed Lord and that his work of Calvary is enough to cleanse you.

Continue - Return to your place in him.

Failure is eminent because of the flesh temple we live in and the fallen state of the world in which we live. The Lord knows your frame and that you were but dust….but the Lord also know why he sent Christ to die for you and

The Call

Sweet Call

Tuesday, April 7, 2020

9:18 AM

Birthed in the moment of pain a passion and struggle the moment when I press toward God, I  encounter  counter operations.

There then must be something behind this inability to get and feel right.

17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.

5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit. 6 For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. 7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.

This is war on my life to settle once and for all who will stand over me. The battle of faith is dig into the rock of God's word and build so that when the fight comes and I see the illicit I know to run to the protective custody with which I have been bought.

I have been bought with price of the Blood of Jesus. There then is my commitment tested, in the trial only not in the time of peace.

Lord Jesus, I hear you calling out to me. And I want to enjoy those things that illicit, but you have captured me. You have my heart so I give you my heart, and my body and mind. Although I feel it, I know you beyond my feelings. Here am I.

Strengthening Your Resolve

Resolve Fortified

Monday, April 6, 2020

9:38 AM

One of thee most frustrating things to work from home is that I am trading accountability for comfort. There is no way to through what I am doing up against any real time standards in the person of my supervisor. This is a blessing and a curse at the same time because I could be jeopardizing my IT future because of the mistakes that I am making. Typically when there is no accountability your own sense of perform is how you rate your ability.

Although I am experiencing this at work I am not feeling this way in ministry. I have never been so sure of what is happening and which way I am going in my life. Oddly enough there is not additional emotional security in that because I want to be secure in other cases.

Just now I heard the voice of Mike Todd " If you are getting the bag, then you making your resource your source."

The hardest part of following God is learning to fully sacrifice. Bishop McClendon mentioned something about what the nature of the sacrifice is for the believer and how makes the distinction to note that the sacrifice of Christ pays for our sins past present and future. But our sacrifice comes when present our bodies, mouths our minds, talents gifts and time for his purposes. He said " When you praise god consistent with what his sacrifice afford us this is the sacrifice."

I am find more and more peace in God over what is happening in my life and strangely I am more and more fearful of the outcome should I fail to follow in my definition of perfectly.

There then lies our greatest challenge. Learning to fully surrender.

Prayer

Lord, I can hear you calling out with your word. " If a Man wish to come after me, he must first deny himself, take up his cross and follow me."

Jesus I am seeing the cross I must die on. Everything in my flesh wants to avoid the cost to follow but everything connected to you it pressing me into lay down and open hands and cross my feet.

Could it be that I have been hearing you this long and not listening.

" I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and future, then you call to me and come and find me when you seek me with all of your heart.  And I will be found of you saith the Lord. And I will set you free…"

Here is the meditation If he knows the plans then my job is not to plan but to follow. The cost to follow is your heart. " Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to thine own understanding but it all thy ways acknowledge him and he will direct thy paths." " My heart does safely trust in him." When the cost is paid the reward is given. The father then says I will be found by you…The will of God cannot be revealed unto you crucify your own.  "

20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.  Gal 2:20" 

16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.  Gal 5:16 - 25"

5 For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection:6 Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.7 For he that is dead is freed from sin.8 Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him:9 Knowing that Christ being raised from the dead dieth no more; death hath no more dominion over him.10 For in that he died, he died unto sin once: but in that he liveth, he liveth unto God.11 Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord. Rom 6:5-11"

The way is clear there is nothing stopping me from understanding what needs to be done. Its Jesus sacrifice that I buy into when I lay on the cross. When I rise his body is there bearing my sin and faults. I rise daily anew with only his mind in me to follow his call."

Lord, simple obedience seems like its not the answer but then when I look at how much you accomplished on the cross at calavary I cant help but understand that to be true.

Lord Jesus give me the simple courage to obey you. I forfiet my plans and my dreams and passions. My children and wife I commit them to you. My finances and ministry they are yours. I wont move until I hear you speak and Ill stop when you stop talking because I believe you have the planned my steps.

I am not fan of saying make it like it was…but please make it like it was. When all I could do was lean on you because I was not sure of anything else but your call. Bring me back to the child like sense of faith to know that its your voice when you speak and I speak only what you say just like Jesus and I do what I am led to do.

I crucify my ambitions and I trade it for stillness in you.

Spar

Sparring Session

Friday, April 3, 2020

2:57 PM

I think it is very possible that I am having some feelings about what is going on that may have played over into what we were talking about.

• The feelings we may have to talk about later.

For that I apologize, I did not mean to offend you in anyway.

What my frustration was as it pertains the Generation Devotional that I wrote out an invitation that…

1. Explains the format ( Scripture, Scriptural Reflection and Prayer)
2. Explains how to contribute ( Email and or directly editing the slideshow)
1. The links in the invitation can be saved and reused to accomplish the update of the webpage.

I began to get confused when I saw the additional link on the hub other than one I had already posted.

I want you to be aware that I have been working on this display, function and edit process for two weeks non-stop since we started talking about it. So I found myself getting frustrated because you weren't following the instructions I had made for this process.

I understood our huddle to mean I am permitted the freedom to produce a system that I would maintain, determine its functions and be held accountable for. I perceive this as you taking liberties that you would not be comfortable with me taking, similar to prayer.

If you draw

If You Draw…

Monday, March 30, 2020

1:38 PM

The Lord said to me

" Are you willing to let me set your agenda? Start with your morning letting me tell you want to do?"

Lord I am willing.

Is there something I need to be doing as father right now that I am not giving attention to?

• Answer

Is there something as a husband that my attention needs to be one to please you?

• Answer

A leader in your work is there something that I need to give great attention to?

• Answer

Stop performing and be who I called you to be. I have seated your heart in the place that please me most. Consult the word.

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not thine own understanding but in all thy ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths.

Imperative of the text implies what you prayer should sound like.

My Robyn - Lord speak to me.

For the next three days for 10 mins place her on your chest and tell her how much you love her and how proud of her you are. Turn up the heat on the love intensity.

My Selena

Speak into her life. Speak up as it were. Tell her what she can be and do. Hold her close.

The moments of nearness are coming to an end with your children. Its very important that you seek intentionally capture these moment and hear me when its time to speak into them. Setting the stage for their success is your responsibility, regardless of the flashes or problem that present themselves remember I have divine appointed you to be the course unto me.

Mywife

Ensure your communication is gentle to her. Be careful to build her consistently as you interact with her. Avoid the provocation to go tit for tat and speak to her in the context of her roles both to you and your home.

My ministry

Develop the devotional(learn the coding necessary to make the google site reflect your desire) and commit to services. Don’t forget to remain in studies and developing your sermons. Stay sharp your moment will come suddenly.

I Thirst

I Thirst

Monday, March 30, 2020

12:03 PM

The place I am in this morning is probably the worse I have felt in a long time. I watch Mike Todd's come up story and I listened to how his parents talked about him and I see all of the things God has been able to do though his ministry and I am honestly provoked to jealous.

Lord, Teach me not lust after what men have but to seek your face for what you want for my life. The root of my issues that plague me when it comes to porn and zeal is that I am coveting things that don’t belong to me. I have a taste for something illicit and its not like you for me to remain there. Help me to participate in my own freedom. Help me to blockout all the sound and noises and get my heart full centered on you.

Perhaps it would help if I did not have some my glaring similarities between him and myself I terms of music and prophetic word that I would do great works and even greater than my father.

I find myself in space of doubt and fear. I know the lord did not call me to that. But I cant seem to maintain spiritual fervor enough to keep my sights on him.

Lord Jesus, I am not asking for this to be easier but I guess I am. Help me turn my heart to you and hear you when you call out to me. Help me not over complicate this simple love relationship with you wherein my responsibility is to obey you when you call out to me. Give me a spirit like Abraham in that when you call out to me I can answer you " Here I am". Jesus Lord forgive my sinful thoughts and errant ways that I have exalted against your knowledge and you ways. I turn from myself and turn to you. Help me run to you. I am trapped in a body of sin that is more prevasive then my poor head can keep up with. Release not my affliction and my heart to seek you with true brokeness and contrition and to stay before you.

The Lord has been faithful in letting me know that Mike is not provocation for what I should be asking for. Neither is my father the standard.

"I am allowing you to see with your eyes how I want to bless you. I want you to echo the sentiment Mike and Your Father Did….I just want to do His will."

There is then a rustling in my spirit one that calls me to silence and peace because I understand that my clarity comes from my quietness before Him.

So then Father speak to me. Tell me what you want house of hope to be. What you want for me as husband and me as father and me as leader and me as father. Father tel

Dream

My Dream

Friday, March 27, 2020

8:00 AM

I had dream last night that we quartine was lifted in mid April. I don’t fancy myself a prophet like I though once before. But this dream was surreal. A lot of the functions that were planned to occur in April were rescheduled and many of the things that were schedule to happened in march happened in April.

In particular, the birth of my son. The day was horrible sunny and the rays were shinning so bright it kind of reminded me of a day in California. At least from what I had seen in the movies. She was in the back seat breathing hard and I was driving with all the windows down because she was so hot.

We arrived at the hospital to the ER and they wheel her to the trauma center where they would open her up a room. I was there with her for hours….

Then I woke up.

Usually when I had dreams like that two things are true.

The first is that the dream I had stands out against the current conditions. The light surrounding the car that was so bright was not the SUN light…It was the SON light. Which leads me to believe that there is something special about the birth of my son.  I am not sure what it is and I will let the lord reveal that to me in time.

With you lord I can be naked and unashamed.

With you lord I can be open and have no fear.

For I have found in you friend that I can trust.

That is why you will remain my great physician.

I have found place where I can find true love.

I have found place where I can be brand new.

A place where my mistakes don’t become my end

A place where I'm not judged based on my past.

New Day

The New Day

Wednesday, March 25, 2020

8:17 AM

These series of encounters that I have been having sitting in my chair have been intense. This is what I prayed for an encounter with the Lord that far reached my experience that forces me to bow my need to him.

I am putting down my corona…though I like and my pen…tho it helps me feel good. I am willfully trading those things for my relationship with the Lord.

This is something I could have done long ago. But I waited to when it best suited me and the fact is that it never did help.

To think I would be better off I would have just given up sooner. Non the less it is brand new day. And I intend to take advantage of the gift called the present.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

I love the tension in the text….. IF we confess…HE is FAITHFUL. IF implies we may or may not but the latter statement  resolves a truth. HE IS FAITHFUL and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

The bar of soap in my bathroom has an ultimate amount of cleaning power. If I choose to use it is faithful to cleanse…not because I am so good or because water is water, but because the bar maintains in cleaning power regardless of my use or lack thereof.
 

The blood still works regardless of if I apply it or not. The difference is if I don’t apply it…It  wont work on me but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t work…I am lacking.

We are lacking. We are where the operator has applies IF knowing our frame there is a choice laid out before us consistently that we must respond to if we wish harness and experience the cleansing power of Christ blood.

The Shaking

The Shaking

Tuesday, March 24, 2020

1:23 PM

Here in the moment like many other there is a shaking in my soul.

A stirring unto conviction and agitation unto commitment.

It’s the sound of God creating…

The scene from Prince of Egypt where Moses frustrates God and he promises Moses ' I will smite Egypt with all my wonders. Surely I will be with you.'

The shaking becomes more violent and soul stiffening. The sounds of the flowing of the spirit of God is temptous…

He is brooding and his work is mighty but gentle and hard to even begin to speak on.

The words of my mouth, influencing the moment. A deep longing a desire to be found perfect in God's will. To be unmarred by my own sin and weakness.

The inability to express is maxmially frustrating and amazing disturbing because I can see it and hear it and feel it but I have no earthly way of communicating it.

OH LORD

How marvelous is your will for me. That you could give others a magnificent glimpse into manifestation. Teach my heart to gaze directly into your face.

You are so close to me I can feel.

I can almost touch you.

And it frightens me…but I need it to frighten me.

I need to be found humbled by your presence. I need to be found bowing before you entrance….Tho I long to see you face to face….I can no more contain you. I can feel the frality of my humanity and the power of glory resting gently.

I am terrified but I long to be, that then I will have respect unto your entrance and will I have deference to your call.

Teach me obedience … Make me to know you deeply and show me the position that pleases you.

The Press

Pressing Towards Purpose

Tuesday, March 24, 2020

10:17 AM

There seems to be constant lull I seem to experience on regular basis. I find contentment with doing different things very often and at the same token find pure discontentment when things are not as stable as I wish them to be.

Im beginning to believe that the reason why this is because I am not in my place of purpose. I can remember very vividly the feelings of discomfort that I would fight through to make sure I was right for the children I served.  This energy was absent and is absent today because I am doing something I feel it totally unrelated.

But I know better than to think that small. If God is who he says he is a does what he claims he does then every single step I take fits in the purpose he has for my life. Even the missteps and the straying. Somehow God take the things I dislike, am discontented with, and am full discomforted by to make them fit into the plan he has for my life.

The closer I get his heart the clearer these things become and more overwhelmed I get. I am unaccustomed to such lofty thoughts and rich visions. I am constantly making the mistake of looking at my hands not his will. Even in this moment my thoughts are swirling around to how Jesus did much the same when he looked at his purpose.

35 And Jesus went about all the cities and villages, teaching in their synagogues, and preaching the gospel of the kingdom, and healing every sickness and every disease among the people.

36 But when he saw the multitudes, he was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted, and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd.

37 Then saith he unto his disciples, The harvest truly is plenteous, but the labourers are few;

38 Pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he will send forth labourers into his harvest.

Here it is Jesus on earth seeking out the purpose for which he was sent and he gets to place where he was MOVED by the circumstances. It affect him at the deepest point of his soul (so to speak). His response was Pray the Lord to send forth those who would labor to lead those sheep to the good shepherd.

He saw it could not just be him alone but it had to be team effort that everyone one who knew the voice of the shepherd could lead others to the shepherd.

God is not call us to a way…he is calling people to himself. He is not calling me to a work. He is calling me to himself. The work is what I am doing as I come to him.

9 For we are labourers together with God: ye are God's husbandry, ye are God's building.

10 According to the grace of God which is given unto me, as a wise masterbuilder, I have laid the foundation, and another buildeth thereon. But let every man take heed how he buildeth thereupon.

11 For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ.

12 Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble;

13 Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is.

14 If any man's work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward.

15 If any man's work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.

16 Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?

From <https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Corinthians+3&version=KJV>

The softer nuances associated with this text is this…. V9 says we are laborer together with God and then says we are his building. V13 goes on to say every mans work will be made manifest for the day shall declare it…. This reference matches in intention Jesus language to the crowd when he says at that day or at the last day.

We will have journeyed and built things that we will present to the Father for testing. And if we have listened and followed the Lord will then test it. Another scripture comes to mind with the same context of forward movement or upward building.

Jesus says whoever hears these words of mine and does them is like a man who built his HOUSE on rock and when the winds, rain and storms came beat up on the house it stood strong. But the man who hears my words and does them not is like a man who built his HOUSE on sand and when the winds, rain and storms came beat up on the house it fell and fall was great.

It is divinely set into mans nature is to build but what and how he builds is based upon what he hears. The thing man is building is not removed from him it is what he intends to live in and represent consistently.

The fact continues to remain is that work that is being done not of my voiltion but of obedience. I am called up until a communion out of which I work and live and have my being. May I never forget that it is of my relationship with God that I might work might works. That it is of a loving relationship of submission and honor to his Lordship do I live out the the plans he has for my life.